Are You Stalking Me? Because That Would Be Super!

I set up a site meter. It's pretty cool. Except I just have the standard one so I don't think (or even better, am too stupid to figure out how) I can see how people are getting here from search engines. I may have to upgrade because my blog friends are continuously posting the strange search results for how people got to their blogs. Like go read ADW's post today, you'll spit out whatever you're drinking, I'm fairly certain.

All technology aside, site meter is awesome because I can see who's stalking my blog. And I say, if you're stalking me, at least leave me a damn comment. It's common courtesy people.

So I ask you, if you're stalking my blog...leave me a comment. Tell me who you are, who brought you here, and if you actually read my blog and enjoy it...let me know what you enjoy :)

Also, please help me figure out where the wackos are coming from. Do I need to upgrade? Because boo, they make you pay for that.

*kisses*

I'm so confused...

First, I spoke with Husband after he read yesterday's post and even he admits that it is likely that one of two things would happen:

1) You'd think I'm weird and stop reading my posts
2) You'd be offended and stop reading my posts

So in lieu of having people stop reading my posts, I will only indulge you, my loyal readers, with a couple of tidbits of information...

A couple of days ago, I was bored. (Husband has had to close pretty much every night since we've been married.) With such boredom comes strange ideas. So I did something that most people would be worried about. I, on the other hand proceeded to clean the kitchen, take Ozzy out, and clean the cats litter box before remembering the very strange and random thing I just did out of sheer boredom.

And that's all you get. :)

Margarita commented that she doesn't know how I got my blog name, Little Spoon. So here we go. Brace yourself b/c it is such a riveting story...

You know how when you're spooning with a significant other, one person is on the outside and one person is on the inside? Well I call that Big Spoon and Little Spoon respectively. Back before husband was fiance, he was just boyfriend and he would always ask me to come be his Little Spoon. And the nickname stuck. :)

I told you it was riveting.

But on to why I titled my post "I'm so confused"...

I watched The Bionic Woman last night. And it had a good story line but very bad acting. I'll watch it next week but if the actors don't get over their nervousness of being in a remake of a shitty 70's tv show, then I'm done.

I don't know how many of you saw the teaser they ran for the pilot about every 45 seconds on NBC this summer, but part of the premise is that there are 2 bionic women. A "good" one and a "bad" one.

Well the show opens, three years ago with the "bad" bionic woman killing about half of the staff at the medical facility where she was made/trained. So they have to kill her. And by kill her I mean, they shoot her, twice.

So I'm confused...you made her bionic...what makes you think that if you shoot her twice it will kill her? Obviously she's going to come back and be super pissed.

Hasn't anyone ever thought about, I don't know, maybe cutting the head off of something that can regenerate? I mean, they can regenerate from a cut or a broken arm, but I'm pretty sure that if you cut their head off, they die.

So my point is, (and I said this to my mother on the way to work this morning) if I ever come across a Bionic Woman or for an even better example, a vampire, and they have beef with me, I'd cut off their head.

That makes sense to me.

And my mother is very proud of me for knowing how to handle Bionic Women and Vampires.

*kisses*

Husband wanted me to tell you a specific story about myself.

But I can't. And there are several reasons but there's really only one main reason...

It would let you in on how extremely weird I am.

And you know what? I like my blog friends. I don't want them scared off because I sometimes do weird things.

But this was a really weird thing for me to do.

And funny.

Oh well.

*kisses*

The latest fiasco...with some great news at the end!

So my wedding ring broke.

Yes, broke. I know, it is difficult to comprehend. I'm still in shock.

I woke up the day after my wedding and did the typical; I held my hand up to admire my new bling. Aaaaaand noticed that my baguettes were separating. I don't think I need to state how incredibly annoying this is.

But since this was the day after my wedding I decided that short of a diamond falling out of my wedding band, I could deal with it until it's bi-annual cleaning in January.

Then Sunday night, precisely 3 weeks after my nuptials, I was playing with my rings and felt some resistance. I held my ring up under a light and was shocked to discover that the band had split. Like a cheap, chintzy ring you purchased 3 for $5 at Claires.

I was furious for several reasons. The first being the obvious...it was Sunday night and there wasn't anything I could do about this. The second being, I was there when we purchased my wedding band. It's not cheap. Good thing we purchased all the insurance and warranty we could. Because, let's face it...I'm a klutz.

So after I sorted through my anger and sadness, I finally made peace with the fact that I had to part with my wedding ring. I did this by pouting to husband.

(Have I ever explained to you how freaking awesome my husband is? He says I'm spoiled rotten but if he's the spoiler, does he really have any right to judge?)

Husband added me as an authorized user on his jewelry store account so that I could get my ring shipped off to be repaired AND purchase a placeholder ring.

My sister finds it weird that I now have two wedding bands. But as my friends pointed out last night, since I purchased a plain white gold band (that once my real wedding ring is back will take up occupancy on my right hand) I will be able to wear a wedding ring to any event.

For example:

Fancy dinner party? Engagement and Wedding Ring
Camping (HAHAHA like I would go camping)? Plain band
Planning on running into a Psychotic ex? Bling Bling
Going to the Beach? Plain band.

Making up excuses for having two wedding bands is awesome!

Congratulations Molly!

*kisses*

Married Life: Volume 2

I'm not sure why all of my "Married Life" posts so far have revovled around my sleep habits. But apparently I'm a wacky sleeper. What follows is a re-telling of a conversation husband and I had Friday night. Bear in mind, I had already been alseep for a couple of hours...

Scene: I sit straight up in bed and start to frantically search around.

Husband: "What's wrong baby?"
Me: "I can't find it"
H: "What?"
M: "I can't find it. You know that thing."
H: (holding up remote) "You mean the remote? It's right here."
M: "No, the other thing. You know, its white?"
H: "What?"
M: (very exasperated) "THAT WHITE THING! You know, it closes bags and it's magnetic and hangs on the refridgerator."
H: (finally catching on that I'm sleeping) "The Euro-Sealer?"
M: "YES! Where is it?"
H: "I imagine it's on the refridgerator."
M: "Will you go check?"
H: "Sure." (5 seconds later, he didn't even bother getting out of bed) "Yes, it's still there."
M: "Good! Thank you. I love you. Goodnight."
H: "Good night baby."

Apparently, it's really cute when I do this. I'm glad he thinks so.

Also, don't ask. I have no idea what I was dreaming about that would involve the Euro-Sealer.

*kisses.

I'm...

***

That's right folks. I'm actually in the middle of my busy season. (who knew I had a busy season?) Such bad timing too. I have so many wonderful pictures still waiting to be shown to you all. And I know you're all chomping at the bit to see them too.



I promise that one of these days I'll get around to regular posting again. And, I might even throw a new weekly post your way. But I need to make sure I can get enough info first.



I love you all.



*kisses*

***psst....that's a picture of a swamp. For those of you who are lucky enough to not know what one looks like.

So Sorry...

I apologize for the lateness in posting today. I worked from home today and yes, husband I actually worked. Hence the 5pm posting.

I adore working from home. It means I don't have to come home and worry about chores. It means Mr. Ozzy can go to the bathroom more frequently. It also means I can do all the monotonous work that should have been done last week in front of reruns of Project Runway and reminiscing through the first season of Heroes. September 24 cannot come quickly enough. And yes, I'm totally aware that's only 6 days away. I have waited forever for the second season of Heroes, b/c in my book that show only has one direction to go towards...and that's up. (FRWYING MAN!)

What was the monotonous work that I did today you ask? Well we recently printed around 3000 postcards for work. We're in the middle of recruiting for next year. It wasn't until we received the 3000 postcards that we noticed instead of saying September 21st, they said September 21th. (The twenty firth is now a running joke between my friends.) So I spent the majority of my day taking a sharpie and marking out the TH.

But Mim, why did you have to do that from home...it seems like carrying a box full of 3000 postcards home and then back to work is more work than necessary.

Ah, correct you are. This morning was the morning I...CHANGED MY NAME! Unfortch, I can't get a new license until Thursday b/c apparently the Social Security Office and the DMV are in cahoots to make me take more vacation time.

But now, my name is (almost) officially changed. All the remains is changing it at work and getting a new license.

I do have a question though...why is it that the women have to do all of this work? Why do we have to get to the Social Security Office at the buttcrack of dawn to take on a new name? Ah well, it was worth it.

Things I learned while changing my name:

• Even if you're the first car in the parking lot, it doesn't mean you're first in line.
• Lines don't exist at the Social Security Office.
• When getting a Social Security card for your newborn you can't just give them a birth certificate, you also need to present some other form of ID. I will keep this in mind when I have children and bring a stack of pictures of my newborns accompanied by a label maker.
• I now have to spell my name using the Trucker alphabet for customer service representatives. (V as in Victory...)

Tomorrow, I will be back in the office and near my wedding picture cd, promise!

*kisses*

The Cermony

I warn you now that some of these pictures will be a little dark. This is because a million an one people were taking pictures. These are pictures taken by my brother in law.

Here are the boys lined up waiting for us to walk down the aisle. You will notice that they are not on the traditional side. This is b/c I didn't want my cyst scar in the majority of my wedding pictures. And yes, I realize there is a thing called tradition and yes I realize there is also a marvelous computer program called Photoshop. But, since our hired photographer took over 1000 pictures I thought I'd save his assistant from having to touch up every single photo.

But, I digress. Aren't the boys handsome?


Then comes the processional of my girls. They walked down to The Vienna Boys Choir singing Pachalbel. It made me tear up. It was beautiful. The order is as follows:

SB:


Kogan:


Sissy:


My Sister:
Then my little elf and cherub. Notice the elf's faux-hawk!

Then me and my father. Some friends said they heard this weird sound and couldn't tell if I was laughing or crying. My sister thought I was crying. Our friend Perry thought it was hysterical laughter. I don't remember much...

Although, apparently when I saw husband I yelled "Hi Honey!" and then started giggling the rest of the way...see...


Cherub played with my veil the entire service...

I know that most of you are ready to kill me for wearing Crocs in my wedding. But we also walked down the aisle to the Batman theme song. It's how we roll.


Tomorrow: Family Pictures

*kisses*

Married Life Vol. 1

I know I promised to post pictures of the ceremony but if you remember I went off on a tangent last Friday as well...

Anywho...Since I got married almost 2 weeks ago people won't stop with asking me the same question over and over again..."How's married life?"

My answer? Also, always the same, "I'll let you know when it hits me."

That's right folks...it hasn't hit me yet that I'm married. I mean, sure it's nice to not have to say the dreaded "Baby, it's time to take me home" sentence anymore. It's nice to fall asleep on the couch and have husband wake me up and carry (!) me to bed. It's nice waking up in the morning next to the man I love...it's also nice to yell at my husband about Taco People.

Confused? Here's some insight into my brain. Sometimes I wake up from dreaming but think I'm still in the dream. I'll carry on conversations with no one and its only when my eyes fall on the alarm clock or another familiar object, that my brain registers the fact that I was still dreaming and that I need to go back to sleep. This phenomenon usually occurs when I'm excited about something. Like when I was in NYC the week before my wedding I had a dream and I remember sitting up in my bed talking on my cell phone to one of my friends about the wedding. We were planning her arrival, I believe. I finished my conversation and turned my phone off. A couple of seconds later I was becoming really frustrated b/c my phone wouldn't turn off and it was then I realized that the phone I was talking on? Turns out I had my comforter up to my ear. And turning that comforter phone off? I was hitting the comforter in my lap in an exasperated 'why won't this stupid phone turn off?'

Now these kinds of dreams have occurred all of my life. I'm quite used to them. Husband, though I have high hopes for the future,is not so used to them. Two nights ago he got home from work about the time I was going to bed. I told him not to stay up too late and to come to bed early since he had to work early the next morning. He swears that I was not in bed more than 45 minutes ahead of him but I was apparently already into my dream cycle...b/c when he came in I started talking to him about Taco People*. That my Taco People needed to meet his Taco People and so on and so forth. He was really confused and kept asking me what I meant and after clearly explaining to him that "MY Taco people needed to meet HIS Taco people" I realized what I was doing, yelled "I'm dreaming" into his face and rolled over and went back to sleep.

Welcome to married life y'all.

*kisses*

*To be fair to my subconscious...we had tacos for dinner that evening. I'm just saying*

Why didn't anyone tell me my dress was so large?

In the many fittings of my dress I never realized what a pain it would turn out to be. Don't get me wrong...it was beautiful and I felt like the princess that husband thinks I am while in it...but damn if that dress wasn't poofy.

Exhibit A: Trying to walk over to the church with dignity, grace and a serious need to not get my dress dirty...


Exhibit B: It took forever to get me into this position:

And it's funny too b/c you can see where the petticoat ends and the dress keeps going. Standing up was even harder.

Also, the petticoat...was the middle sized one. I don't even want to know how girls get around in the biggest sized one.

I don't even want to get into me getting up and sitting down over and over again at the reception.

Tomorrow: The Ceremony! Accompanied by yet another funny story.

*kisses*

I feel pretty...

I'm super duper perky today, which I know is only a result of my cup of coffee this morning and will wear off before 10 o'clock. But at least I'm perky now! Always look on the bright side of life!

Ok...here we go with some pictures of my actually in my dress...

Mom's making sure I'm fastened in correctly. We were running way behind and she hadn't even had a chance to put on her pretty party dress.


Sometimes she'd tie it just a little too tight!


Runyon helping me attach my veil. I think Mom was actually just jabbing the bobby pin into my head. Bride's wench to the rescue!


This is one of my favorite pictures. Have I ever mentioned how much I loved my veil? We made it. If you look closely you can see the beading around the bottom.


Showing off my comfy wedding shoes


And a close up...just so I can hear Margarita's groans all the way from NYC. You may think they're ugly but girl are they comfy.

Just in case you're wondering...that's a penny in my shoe. The saying goes...

Something Old, Something New
Something Borrowed, Something Blue
And a Penny in Your Shoe.

Remember that all you brides to be.

Tomorrow: trying to maneuver myself over to the church for the ceremony!

*kisses*

The moment (most of) you have been waiting for...

There it is...my wedding dress.

Tomorrow: Putting me into it!

I'm sorry, I was late for work this morning b/c I had to get a parking pass. So, unfortunately I have to get some work done. And today's post suffers for it :)

Also, please say a prayer today for the families, friends, and loved ones of those taken from us 6 years ago today. 9/11, never forget.

*kisses*

Wedding Prep Part 1: Hair and Makeup

Thank you for allowing me to vent.

Now on to more enjoyable things...prepping for my wedding. I do have several pictures of me dancing around in my bra but husband would be kind of mad if I posted them here. Although, on a fun side note, I wonder how many hits I'll get today from people who google the word 'bra'.

Here I am waiting to get me hair done. And before my hairstylist told me she had wine for me!

My hair is getting seriously long. I think it is time for a trim!

Runyon doing Kogan's hair...Runyon was such a lifesaver. We nicknamed her "Bride's Wench" during the wedding b/c she ran around and did everything my brain wasn't allowing me to do. She even anticipated my needs several times...I guess it is true what they say about good stage managers (it's how we met)

My sister's pretty hair, which took about 10 minutes to do. My hair stylist rocks!

Spraying my hair to keep it in place...notice I now have my wine...

My hair stylist and I decided we should make a hair clip that looks like my wedding hair and market it as the "The Mim". In fact...I really need to send a picture of it into The Knot.

And here are all my girls (minus my sister in law) before leaving the hair salon...

Runyon doing my makeup for the wedding...I told you she was my wench!


Tomorrow: Long awaited photos of my dress!

*kisses*

Excuse Me...

...While I Bitch!

I know you were expecting Wedding prep pictures today but I just can't do it. I'm upset, let me tell you why, b/c I need to get it out of my system.

I feel really bad for husband. Before the wedding he worked 9 days straight. And even when he was on 'vacation' he wasn't on vacation. Weddings are stressful and even though I've been back to work for three days now, I still don't feel 100% up to par.

Before I get into what is really irking me let me give you some background on husband...

He works in retail. Not the most glamorous of occupations but husband could sell water to a fish, a dead horse to a cowboy, really anything to anybody. He's just a natural born seller. He's really good with people.

He started working at his current job back in March (I think) and it was abundantly clear that he would be moving up in the company. Now he's already an Assistant Manager (walked into the job with that title) and in November will be taking over his store as manager.

Now the current manager of his store is none of the above things. In fact I've heard him yell at customers before. And not just yell, criticize, humiliate, basically everything you're not supposed to do to your customers, this guy does. I know what you're thinking I'm going to say next...that this guy is getting fired, and husband is taking his job...this is not the case. Bad Manager or BM (haha, BM) is getting transfered to a store that is closer to where he lives.

Ever since husband came into this very small store (in comparison to it's other stores in the area) he's managed to turn this store around. Sales are up, Loss Prevention is down, Morale is up. Husband's been in the top 5 since he started...which is why he's going to be a manager soon.

Ok...I promise I'm back on track...almost...

So, BM has to train Husband to be a manager...shouldn't be too hard. Husband's a quick learner. Except BM thinks training means making Husband do everything while BM does nothing. NOT COOL WITH ME. Seriously, BM is about to have one very angry redhead on his hands.

BM makes husband close most every night. The managers get two days off a week. When Husband asked for two days off in a row BM gave him Sunday and Monday off and then made him work 9 days straight before the wedding!

Now, husband went back to work yesterday. Oh, did I mention his work is 40 minutes away from where we live? And the air conditioning went out in his car again? And it's September in North Carolina? Well you can imagine his annoyance at just driving to work, let alone getting there and finding his new schedule along with a note that read:

"Yes, you're working 9 days straight.
No, you can't change the schedule*."

Meanwhile, all the managers are getting ready for their annual convention which is being held in Vegas this year. They all leave Saturday. So what does BM do? He schedules himself to be off Thursday and Friday. Leaving the only other person, besides husband, who has a key (3rd key) to the store to work 11 days straight!

By the way I really like 3rd key. I also feel really bad for him b/c this is not the first time BM has done this to him. You may remember my beach trip? Well Husband being the Assistant Manager got the 4th of July as paid vacation. Which works out well since when Husband got hired he said "I need this week off". Well BM decided he wanted the 4th off too, b/c being manager he could but was told he could use it as a floating holiday. But he decided to use it on the 4th and then take the next two days off, giving him 3 days off in a row. (EVEN THOUGH HE JUST GOT BACK FROM A WEEK"S VACATION) So he made 3rd key work open to close on the 4th of July. Husband and I felt terrible about this and even offered to come back from vacation early to help.

I'm so mad I cannot even see straight. I could understand (understand not condone) this behavior if Husband was taking BM's job therefore leaving BM without a job (and in a perfect world this would be the case) but he's not.

So I have a question for you BM:

"Were you picked on as a little kid?"

Because that's the only thing I can think of. You were picked on so now that you're older you feel like you can be the bully. Grow up, be a man. Middle School was (for you) decades ago. Let it go man.

I'm sorry for the rambling but it makes me so mad. I just got married. I don't need my husband deflated like this. Husband and I don't fight...we never have...but if we ever argue it's b/c of his crazy work schedule. It makes him cranky and tired...which in turn makes me shut down.

Luckily, like I said, Husband will be manager soon and he'll get to make the schedules. Everybody loves it when Husband makes the schedule. Because he doesn't make a schedule for just himself. He makes it for his entire team. He will not be a dictator like BM.

I love you husband.

Monday...I promise...Wedding Prep!

*kisses*

*Husband had to change the schedule b/c it had him working open to 5:15 on Sunday and the store closes at 6. BM basically looks at the computer generated schedule, fixes it to give himself the best schedule but then doesn't pay attention to the rest of it. IDIOT.

Something Quick

Just a quick little shout out to a new blog I found while bored at work today.

These Little Moments has kept me entertained and a slight bit scared this afternoon.

Go and read through some of her archives and I swear some of you will think I started a new, fake blog. (If not for the girl in the pictures who, of course, doesn't look a thing like me:))

It's quite scary. And wonderful. Enjoy

*kisses*

The Rehearsal and Rehearsal Dinner

Let me just say we had a blast. Everybody was really happy to see each other. We were all there and we were way to giggly.

At the rehearsal we did a 'talk through' and a 'walk through'. We talked it through once and then we walked it through once. Everybody hit their mark. I was so proud.

Now before I get a million comments about how the girls are on the wrong side let me explain it to you. Remember my cyst? Well after paying a lot of money to have it removed, it came back. I'm self conscious about it and if we were to stand the way we're "supposed" to it would have been in all my wedding photos. And we can't have that, now can we?

I wish that I had pictures about what happened after our walk through. Because it is incredibly priceless. During our walk through we practiced our kiss and once husband and I got back down the aisle, the ring bearer who followed us and is all of 7 years old asked us "So are you guys going to go have sex now?" DIRECT QUOTE. We all lost it making us seem immature and not ready for marriage apparently but it was cute and unexpected that you can't help but bust a gut because of it.

After the rehearsal came our rehearsal dinner which was a pig pickin'. There was so much food, I wouldn't be surprised if we're eating pork for the rest of our lives.

Husband's groom's cake looked like this:

Isn't it fun? We also have a lot of this cake left over.

Because my wedding was so close to Labor Day I decided a great party favor for the rehearsal dinner would be sparklers. and it turns out they're a great way of getting people's attention...even if you look like the Statue of Liberty in the process...

But I had to get everyone's attention to give my Maid's their presents that I bought for them while in NYC...


I think this next picture is funny because it represents husband now and husband in 20 years...

Also, could husband pimp it up anymore? Geez :)

You can find all of the Rehearsal/Rehearsal Dinner pictures here.

Tomorrow: Wedding Prep!

*kisses*

The Bachelorette Party...

Starting off the night at Kachi, Japanese Steakhouse:

Note, that while I am giggling like a fool, I'm sober.

After dinner before the bar, I received my "task" for the evening. Sell each sucker for a buck. Or...'Suck for a Buck'

I only ended up with 9 left after the night was over but I think that was because I kept giving them away. :)

Getting progressively drunker and dancing with my cue stick:

All my girls at the Raven:


I leaned against the bar and got some nasty on my shirt...Mego's Tide Stick to the rescue!


Everybody...FOOTLOOSE!


I did a really good job of selling my suckers:


And in the meantime, somehow got drunker...


And then the band called me up on stage! Woohoo!


I had a super fun night...Thanks to all my girls for making it so special!

You can see all the pictures here.

Stay tuned for Rehearsal Dinner pictures and a super awesome story!

*kisses*

Sisters

So my sister has posted all of my wedding pics on flickr and gave me a CD full of pics as well. Unfortch I cannot pull the pics from flickr b/c they save as gifs and I forgot the cd at my parents house last night so here's a teaser pic.

This is me and my sister after the wedding:

I promise more pics to come...

Also my Shia post was written like a month ago and I scheduled it to post yesterday.

*kisses*

Honestly?

I swear I will post some pictures soon. But first...my first non wedding related post in quite some time...


When did this:


Turn into this?:


Meow. And I can say that even though I'm married(!). (I love you baby!) I'll say it again. Meow.